NOT that I have a boyfriend. That title is just moving too fast. From henceforth, I shall refer to him as “the guy I slept with on the second date after knowing he existed for a week but only actually knowing him for three days” because THAT’S not moving too fast, but calling him my boyfriend after a month of seeing each other almost every day, two days being the max time apart because he went on a four-day trip, but I saw him the morning he left and the night he came back, now THAT is too fast.
Got that? Good. Now moving on.
When I met TGISWOTSDA- KHEFAWBOAKHFTD I was wearing a skirt. On our first date, I wore a skirt. On the infamous second date, I wore a dress. Basically, we live in an amazing climate and dresses and skirts are my go-to just about year-round.
A few weeks in (also known as a few weeks ago), I worried that I was coming off as high maintenance by wearing such girly things all the time because so many people associate dresses with being dressy and rarely understand how low-key they actually are.
However, after one of our romps, I redressed with amazing speed and he became a believer and now fully agrees that dresses are the best thing to happen to women’s wardrobes since the thong (although, this begs the question of which came first…the ass-hugging dress or the panty-line-reducing g-string?).
So, then I started worrying that I was setting the bar too high, since dresses are indeed cute, sexy AND low maintenance. What happens when mama wants to wear jeans or hasn’t shaved her legs? Just kidding, non-boyfriend, I will ALWAYS shave my legs because I will ALWAYS be ready for one of our amazing sessions.
The other night, post-stressful day and post-spin class, I was craving some sweats. I was also heading to his house to make dinner and catch up on some DVR, which are totally sweats-appropriate activities, but I worried…are we THERE? First worried that we WEREN’T and he would be horrified that I downgraded so quickly from flirty skirts to sweats, then worried that we WERE and had sped through dating-stage and got to sweat-stage so fast.
It was then that I realized that you’re only at sweat-stage if you choose to be. And that T*Party yoga pants work wonders for BOTH the ass-loving man and the comfort-loving woman.