Am I bad at dating or just bad in bed?

So, I just got a text from – I shit you not – Mr. No Name, yes, the guy who I called obnoxiously persistent two years ago, which was two years after we first met. It wasn’t totally out of the blue, he’s been texting me for a few months, he met my dad at some networking event and saw that as a way back in, but hasn’t really asked me out or anything.

To figure out just how long this dude has been hanging around, I found this blog. Yes, I actually had to search because I didn’t even remember the name, then I had to try about 15 username/password combos to get in.

FOUR YEARS. And that’s just since No Name. He was kind of in the middle of my dating renaissance – my ADULT dating life if you will.

I read through some old posts, laughed at the guys I’ve dated, laughed at myself (damn I’m funny) and then realized, holy hell, HOW have I possibly been doing this for this long?! How bad AM I at dating? Apparently two-and-a-half years ago, I had a similar WTF moment.

I saw this PostSecret the other day:

18-afraid (1)

I hadn’t really considered that, but now I am too, thanks a lot.

Obviously Buzz and I found stuff to fight about and broke up. That was about six months ago. I was the one who instigated it and I knew the relationship was over, had dealt with it even before we officially broke up and he moved out (yeah that part was not fun), but I haven’t really dated since then. Haven’t gone back online, haven’t gone on any manhunts, haven’t worried if men were checking me out and thinking I was cute. I would say I haven’t really even checked for wedding rings upon meeting men, but come on, that’s like second nature.

I HAVE gotten back to running and yoga and the gym, which I love. I started reading again. I traveled and spent time with my family and friends. I also dreamed of moving away. I think that was a big part of why I wasn’t interested in dating. I didn’t want to meet anyone in Arizona because I didn’t see myself staying here long term. And now I’m not. I’m moving in a week and plan on dating a fair amount. I wish I were more in practice. I’m not sure if this is the rebirth of this blog or if I’ll start a new single in the city type of blog or if I’ll keep my amazing dating stories all to myself (yeah right).

I guess what I’m saying is hey, universe, I’m ready.

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Relationships Urban Legends

Another old boyfriend married.  I feel like I dodged one though because he’s not that cute? I’d post his picture but that would be mean since I just called him not cute, so just agree. And he’s a boy gymnast? Not that there’s anything wrong with that…hi, yum:

But, when you’re 15 and DON’T look like that, it does carry a little stigma. True story: I dated TWO male gymnasts in high school.

Anyway, this recently married one was the first and we “went out” in the 10th grade. According to my memory, that means we kissed on a roof once, his mom drove us to a goofy golfing double date, he touched my leg at lunch and I lied to his ex about dating him because she and I were kinda friends in math class, but then she found out and she wasn’t really all that mad.  So I’m not all that torn up about it and I don’t think it makes me a wife fluffer.

I’ve yet to have an ex marry the one right after me, which is good, I’m not sure I could handle that. I’m losing count, but there are many marriages and babies and even second marriages amongst men from my past.  Oy.

He married my sister’s best friend’s best friend from dance, but I’m still not sure how they met because she didn’t go to our high school and she’s a bit younger.  Just a small world, I guess.

They apparently had a long back and forth relationship and he didn’t always treat her right (via my sis’s friend who didn’t always like this guy for her other friend)…one of those relationship urban legends that single women cling to when they’re not where they want to be in a relationship. 

As in, “it’s okay that he is constantly on his phone when we’re together and when we’re not and I text him he takes four hours to respond because my cousin’s best friend’s hair dresser had a client who dated a guy for three years and he kinda treated her like that, but THEN he married her.”

Probably not the kind of reinforcement I need in my life right now.