I’ve been thinking an awful lot about the last guy I kissed. Not in a wistful way, in a it’s been so long, I actually don’t remember who it was kind of way. I like smooching, so this is sad.
Not much to report for May. I didn’t meet a wonderful man at a grocery store. I didn’t go out on two organic dates as I had previously planned for May whether I documented it here or not.
I did meet a man (organically-ish) who asked me out in May and we went out in June, on Saturday to be exact. It was not an overwhelming, not an underwhelming, just a whelming okay.
Facebook allowed me to prejudge him as slightly overweight, more so than I remembered from when we’d spent time together at Meetup events (thus the ish) so I staged my house for when he came to pick me up. If he can handle my living room being strewn with running shoes + a foam roller, my bike and helmet, yoga mat, sports water bottle and a Camelbak without thinking he’s in over his head, I’ll let him try. Perhaps they’re old pictures anyway and since he’s divorcing, maybe he’s going through one of those fixer up stages, because when I saw him again, I really didn’t see the beer belly from the pics.
On Sunday I got a text from a number I don’t know. Well, I kind of know it…the first three digits are the same as my sister’s and I made that connection when he gave me his number, but I can’t for the life of me remember who it is…obviously someone I’ve deleted since.
And when they’re deleted, it’s for a reason, so when the “hey, it’s been a really long time and I know it’s last minute, but how about dinner tonight?” came in, instead of tempting myself with a response like, “who is this?” that always just comes out wrong to the person on the other end, I just had to delete it, but it’s still driving me crazy!
I searched my phone book for the men who I haven’t seen in a while, but who didn’t have any major red flags, it just kinda fizzled out with but I didn’t delete them because if they grew a pair and asked me out again I’d say yes and they’re all still there, so it’s none of them. I guess the thing that’s really bugging me is if it’s TGISWOTSD. I’m only about 10% that it’s him and 70% it’s Bach #5, leaving 20% for someone who’s completely off my radar and I didn’t even consider.
Finally, I meet a guy through a friend at a bar early last month, did some sufficient Facebook stalking, which turned out more favorably for him. A man who poses with a football and a drink wearing flip flops on the beach at sunset? Yes please! A man who also poses with a Terrible Towel? Panty dropper.
This is the man I contemplated adding, then didn’t, and now finally did. Now I’m cyber-hiding because I feel so exposed waiting for the response, but I guess I figured taking a chance and risking a bit of embarrassment is worth the potential return. Sometimes you just have to make the first move, even if it is an awkward “would you like to be my Facebook friend?” type move.
I have a second date with the married guy tonight. Did you like how I just slipped in there earlier that he’s divorcing like it’s no big deal? It is kind of a big deal to me. I’m beginning to accept divorced is just a way of the world when dating in your late 20s, but divorcing is different. Divorcing is still married, thus, he’s the married guy.
I believe his story, even though it’s basically the same story any still-married man would tell when trying to get with someone else, but my walls are up a bit and I’m mostly just not sure how to proceeed.
Anyway, I’m not too sure I’m feeling him, even outside of his married status. We get along, he’s funny and tells good stories and I enjoyed the whelming first date, but I could pretty much take or leave a second. He wanted to take, so we’re taking, and I’ll give it another shot.
But really, at this point, I know myself and what I’m looking for and while there aren’t words that go with it, I know it when I see it, which is the ONLY reason I’m happy that TGISWOTSD and Nonmush came into my life. If I don’t see it, I have better things to do with my time and I trust that there is at least one more man out there who possesses the ineffable.
“What?! Now I’m not ‘f-able’?!” Name that show and we’re BFF. It’s pretty much the only show I reference. Ever.