Kissing Frogs

Sometimes I say things and people look at me as if I have two heads.  Apparently things I think are “sayings” are not actually sayings.  Or sometimes they are just not sayings that young people these days have heard.  What can I say?  I’m an old soul.

And then there are times when I just make shit up (mostly acronyms and I use them like they’re a thing), but we’re not talking about those times right now.

We’re talking about my recent overuse of the phrase “kissing frogs.”  To me, that means dating guys who aren’t right for me, with the implication that it’s in my search to find my prince. 

Maybe people my age just didn’t read fairy tales when they were younger? 

Anyway, I told a girlfriend my theory at happy hour and she suggested I just walk up to strangers and kiss them to knock out the numbers.  Missing the point.

I told my bestie my theory and he asked, “and by kiss, you mean sleep with?”  Missing the point so very much, but thanks for the vote of confidence about my whore-ish ways.  I let him know I have not slept with 12 men in my life, let alone in between the last two guys I actually liked, nor do I plan on sleeping with 12 in the next five months.

A third, when he assumed I literally meant kiss and I asked him about why no one got it said it was less about not knowing what “kissing frogs” meant and more about knowing what “kissing” meant.  Touche.

My good friend, Peaches, inadvertently taught me a technique to use in these situations.  He – yes, Peaches is a boy – tells this awesome story – all his stories are awesome, you should meet him and just listen to him talk – that involves his playboy father, his playboy father’s lady friend, a dead bird and the phrase, “it’s a well-known fact.” 

So now, anytime someone questions my stories or my phrases that may be from different centuries, I simply say, “it’s a well-known fact that…” and then they can’t argue because obviously they are the stupid one.  It actually kinda worked on bestie.

Am I that far off?  Is “kissing frogs” not actually a thing?


4 thoughts on “Kissing Frogs

  1. I guess I’m an old soul, too, since I remember the phrase “kissing many frogs to find the prince” ever since I was a kid. And, given the image above, I know you’ve already looked up the “Frog Prince” article on Wikipedia so…

    I like Peaches’ approach, though. Throw the other person in the conversation on the defense, that’ll do it!

  2. There was a song about it when I was in highschool, the chorus went something like:

    All princes start as frogs
    All gentlemen as dogs
    Just wait til it’s plain to see
    What we’re growing up to be
    Some dogs will still be dogs
    Some frogs will still be frogs
    Some boys will become men
    Just don’t kiss us til then

    Anyway, I totally got what you were saying. Kissing frogs makes total sense.

  3. Pingback: BABE IN CHRIST » Blog Archive » Dalia Reid Sung a Song About It: I miss You, I Miss You; How Many Ways Can I Say It?

  4. Pingback: On Kissing Frogs « Thinking Woman's Brain Vomit

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